B is for Bread

2200BCE, Egypt, figurine of woman kneading bread. Statue in the Louvre.

It’s not the barley or the wheat
It’s not the oven or the heat
That makes this bread so good to eat
It’s the kneading and the sharing that makes the meal complete

Johnny Cash, “Breakin’ Bread”

I have a confession to make; I sometimes eat bread for dessert. Put a fresh-baked rustic French baguette in front of me with some aged cheddar, and I’d give you the keys to my house. And I’m not persnickety. I’ll take brioche, English muffins, black bread, rye, bagels, challah, biscuits, ciabatta, or foccaccia. It doesn’t even need yeast. I can eat naan, tortillas, lavash, or pita with the best of ’em. Not super-fond of those corn tortillas unless they’re fried with meat, but wasn’t that the point? Wonder bread is probably the only kind I don’t like and never did, otherwise, pretzels count, crackers–hey, don’t get me started on dumplings.

Humans have been making forms of bread for about 30,000 years +/-. They needed fire, but they didn’t need yeast or even organized farming. How yeast got there is its own story, and something of a controversy. They’ve been arguing for the past fifty years, about whether beer came before bread or vice versa. Let’s start without yeast and work our way forward. As with each of my A to Z ancient invention posts, the story of Bread will cover the basics:

  1. A core definition of the “thing”
  2. Where and when it happened first “around the world”
  3. How it influenced human development

As this is only my second “ancient invention” post, it’s worth noting that there is kind of a dividing line when it comes to such inventions. What we know is based on trace evidence, so if the invention depends on something organic, we may only know about it from ancient documentation. If people painted it on the walls or wrote about it stone tablets that can be read, that sets a date, even if it’s not the earliest date. We know about bread from Mesopotamian cuneiform and Egyptian hieroglyphics, but what kind of evidence would predate recorded history? You can’t exactly see bread, thousands of years later, can you?

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When in the Doldrums, Make Lists

I have Norton Juster to thank for a smidgeon of inspiration for today’s post because it’s in his landmark book, The Phantom Tollbooth, where our hero Miles encounters The Doldrums.

Miles encounters The Doldrums in The Phantom Tollbooth, illustration by Jules Feiffer.

Beware the Terrible Trivium

If you haven’t read this masterpiece (or recently re-read your dog-eared copy), I highly recommend it. It’s a kid’s book–or YA as it might be categorized today–but really it’s full of metaphors, so think of it like a more approachable Pilgrim’s Progress. Miles takes a series of journeys through an odd country, encountering strange allegorical creatures like the Spelling Bee and the Humbug. He becomes embroiled in a war between letters and numbers, King Azaz and the Mathemagician, and must battle monsters to rescue the princesses, Rhyme and Reason. I found the Terrible Trivium demon, the dapper man with no face, who sets Miles to tasks like draining a lake with an eye-dropper, to be particularly disturbing.

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What’s Not in Victoria? (Day 10)

So you’re taking the ferry across Puget Sound to Canada? Going to see Vancouver?
No? Oh, over to Victoria. Butchart Gardens, then…
Wait–not the Gardens? Just Victoria?…well, gee… what’s in Victoria?

To begin with, chef’s choice trio in Tapas Garden, Trounce Alley, Victoria. Photo by kajmeister.

I don’t mean to cast aspersions on Vancouver. It’s a lovely city, and I’ve been there twice, cycling around Stanley Park, walking through Gastown, and so on. Butchart Gardens, I’ve seen three times, with and without children, with and without lesbians, just two years ago, in fact. You should come up here just to see them, if you like gardens and I do.

But Victoria, BC has its own vibe worth delving in deep, and we decided on this trip to grant it our full and complete attention. It reminds me of Seattle and San Francisco–very walkable, very picturesque, full of eclectic vibrancy that ranges from the swankiest of hotels to the kitschiest tourisma, pubs, coffee houses, little theaters, modern office buildings, with everything from pierogi bars playing heavy metal to high tea served under a dress code. The culture is spread thickly, but genteelly, on the most delicate of multi-grain, Himalayan sea salted toast.

I’ll prove it to you.

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